Is your ego in charge of your dating life?
The ego’s job is to protect us, but it often creates suffocating loneliness in order to do this.
Our mission, as mindful daters, is to cultivate awareness and to use the ego’s manifestations as opportunities to choose realness, courage, and deep connection.
Why I am obsessed with relationships
I know just how painful it is to feel isolated, blocked from truly loving other human beings—romantically or otherwise. An isolated life is not what we come here on Earth for—and there is so much we can do to open ourselves up to deep love.
Beyond monogamy and polyamory: The freedom of novogamy
What is novogamy? Novogamy is the freedom to adopt any relationship structure that suits you and your partner(s) in a consensual manner, at any given point, without binding yourself to a rigid identity or set of beliefs.
Humanizing online dating through mindful swiping
Mindful Swiping is a way to use online dating as a mindfulness practice—one that helps us cultivate love, awareness, presence, equanimity, and genuine care for ourselves and others while we look for romantic connection.
Never have a boring date again: Ask powerful questions!
You sit down at a cafe for a first date. They start asking the typical, “How are you?—I’m fine”, “What do you do?—I’m an engineer. What about you?”
Snore. Why does this date feel so boring? This person seems cool enough, but they are clueless as to how to move this conversation beyond the surface. So are you.
Let’s talk about how you can start elevating the quality of your dates today.
Are you monoflexible?
Maybe polyamory is not your jam.
Maybe ambiamory—the ability to enjoy both monogamy and polyamory with little to no preference between the two—is still a bit much.
Maybe monogamish sounds vague to you—or 10% more poly than how you really feel.
But maaaybe, just maybe, the idea of strict lifelong monogamy also doesn’t fully apply to you.
Got jealousy? Here’s how to cultivate compersion in any relationship
Looking at love as a way to elevate one another, and taking joy in their autonomous, unique, and incommensurable expression—rather than under the lens of conditionality and control—begins with an intention. When we develop a “compersive attitude,” experiences of envy or jealousy can be framed not as a personal affront, but as an indicator that there is an opportunity to fill our individual and relational plates more abundantly.
10 powerful questions to ask yourself when dating
These questions are designed to assist you in the process of understanding the person in front of you!
Saying NO from the heart
The ultimate goal of dating & intimate relationships is to reach an enthusiastic, heart-expanding, mutual YES!
But—you won’t be able to reach that full YES until you master your NO.
Saying NO—to unwanted dates, sexual acts, relationships, or scripts— is something many of my clients struggle with. But it’s an essential skill in finding and growing loving relationships. Why?
Saying NO to what we don’t want clears space in our lives for what we TRULY do want!
Saying NO when we aren’t fully enthusiastic releases other people from our fake, or half-hearted YES, and gives them the freedom to pursue their own true YES.
Narrative coherence and mindful dating
I was recently working with a client on his online dating profile. The process of creating an assortment of text and media (pictures, video, and/or voice notes) for the purpose of communicating to the world who he is, and what interpersonal connection means to him in a romantic context, became the site of deep internal work around his sense of identity and his vision for love and partnership.